Remembering her today.

"...Thou art my divine treasury in whom all fullness dwells,

my life, hope, joy, peace, glory, end;

May I be daily more and more conformed to thee,

with the meekness and calmness of the Lamb in my soul,

and a feeling sense of the felicity of heaven,

where I long to join angels free from imperfections,

where in me the image of my adored Savior will be completely restored,

so that I may be fit for his enjoyments and employments.

I am not afraid to look the king of terrors in the face,

for I know I shall be drawn, not driven, out of the world.

Until then let me continually glow and burn out for thee,

and when the last great change shall come

let me awake in thy likeness,

leaving behind me an example that will glorify thee

while my spirit rejoices in heaven,

and my memory is blessed upon earth,

with those who follow me praising thee for my life."

--an excerpt from "Retrospect and Prospect", a Puritan prayer from The Valley of Vision

My friend, Kristi, passed away on Friday morning. Her funeral and memorial service are today. The above excerpt to me, perfectly describes Kristi, in her life and death.

Ever since I discovered in late October that she had Stage IV breast cancer, my days have begun and have ended in prayer for her. Hoping against reality that God would heal her. That we would witness a miracle. That she would continue beside her husband, raising her three little boys.

I could pray in that manner because I know and trust that He is able. There is no doubt in my mind. And yet, that was not His will for her life. That was not part of His plan. He chose to bring her home...and while I can't understand why that was best...can't wrap my earthly mind around that...I know that it's true and right and perfect. Because He is Truth and Righteousness and Perfection. And I rejoice with such JOY knowing that she is with her Lord and Savior...in the midst of Glory that we do not yet even imagine.

It's been several years since I last saw Kristi, but when I close my eyes, I can see her radiant smile and hear her voice...especially her laugh. I've been reminiscing old times...remembering hilarious moments and joyful moments and quiet moments spent together. I will miss her...but I look forward to when I will join her...and so many other loved ones...in His Glory.

This last excerpt, also from The Valley of Vision, has been an encouragment to me and a reminder of our life here on Earth and all that we have to look forward to.

"Earth and Heaven"

O LORD,

I live here as a fish in a vessel of water, only enough to keep me alive,
but in heaven I shall swim in the ocean.

Here I have a little air in me to keep me breathing,
but there I shall have sweet and fresh gales;

Here I have a beam of sun to lighten my darkness,
a warm ray to keep me from freezing;
yonder I shall live in light and warmth for ever.

My natural desires are corrupt and misguided,
and it is thy mercy to destroy them;
My spiritual longings are of thy planting,
and thou wilt water and increase them;
Quicken my hunger and thirst after the realm above.

Here I can have the world, there I shall have thee in Christ;
Here is a life of longing and prayer, there is assurance without suspicion, asking without refusal;
Here are gross comforts, more burden than benefit,
there is joy without sorrow,
comfort without suffering,
love without inconstancy,
rest without weariness.

Give me to know that heaven is all love,
where the eye affects the heart,
and the continual viewing of thy beauty keeps the soul in continual transports of delight.

Give me to know that heaven is all peace,
where error, pride, rebellion, passion raise no head.

Give me to know that heaven is all joy,
the end of believing, fasting, praying, mourning, humbling, watching, fearing, repining;

And lead me to it soon.